Wisdom from the Trenches

I’m a list maker. I find satisfaction in brain-dumping what rolls around in my mind onto a piece of paper so the thoughts upstairs don’t drive me absolutely batty or threaten to instigate a system overload. I love the little dopamine boost I get by checking things off my neat little lists. I even add things I just did (past tense) to a list so that I can cross it off and feel productive.

As a list maker, I don’t just make “To Do” lists…I also keep running lists of positive things that spark my interest. I already covered my theory on life, the universe, and everything when I broached the subject of Bucket Lists, but have I mentioned that I keep running tabs on coffee shops I’ve visited and liked? I do. And also: Breweries I have gone to – and what gives them a unique draw. Hikes I’ve been on, the mileage, the elevation gain/loss, and notes about my thoughts on each one. Books I’ve read. Countries I’ve visited. States I’ve been to. The best ethnic grocery stores in my area (complete with addresses and notes about what makes them so special). Expos and conventions I’ve been to and others I’d like to attend. A list of my favorite Christian heavy metal bands. Event ideas I have and will eventually organize and host. And last, but certainly most important: Things I like best in life.

Why would I sit down and take the time to write out a list of my favorite things? The short answer? BECAUSE I CAN. The more informative answer? Because I like to make a concerted effort to appreciate the things in my life that give me feel-good emotions, bring joy into a rough patch, and remind me that life is beautiful when it begins to seem overwhelmingly dreary. I like to have something on hand to guide me on days where I am bored beyond belief and cannot think of something that would awaken my spirit and rejuvenate me. I like to see that I am an active and interesting person on difficult days when I feel very down about myself and depression has taken hold and is dragging me under.

This and prayer is how I most often fight my battles. I surround myself with my truth about things I find fun, nice, pretty – anything admirable or noteworthy in my life…and I focus firmly on God’s truth – all that is good, pure, and right. These are my life vests that keep me buoyant and hopeful in the aftermath of surviving trauma. I carry truth with me and the waters of life don’t seem so deep, dark, and dangerous.

Family and friends are a given, but aren’t on this list because people aren’t “things”. I do, however, have a list of my favorite people locked away in my head. I will not divulge the names of those who are on my list and yes, I have listed specific individuals who are a beacon of positivity in my life. But, here are a few of my very favorite THINGS…things that I suspect will strongly resonate with you. I hope you take a moment to stop today, breathe deeply, really look around you, and appreciate the big and little things that bring you intense, abiding, and sustainable joy.

PETS. I don’t like referring to any pet as a thing, but no “favorites” list could be complete without the living beings that depend upon us for survival – and that provide us, in return, with endless entertainment, unconditional love (or tolerance), and a solid reason to get out of bed every morning. These furry, feathered, and scaly friends are chart-toppers all around. Ask someone about their job or their day or even their favorite holiday and you might get a few words out of them. But ask anyone about their pet and they can talk nonstop for hours. People have created social media accounts for their pets, businesses centered around a beloved pet, voices and narratives for their pet, and give so much attention to their pets that they could probably tell you more about their pet’s personality than they could tell you about their best friend’s! In my house, I am absolutely smitten by my chocolate lab, Diesel, who is a dark brown ball of pure joy! I enjoy talking to my parakeet, Kawalski, who has yet to respond to me, so I guess it’s more of a monologue. I adore sitting on the floor when my daughter brings her 16-pound Flemish Giant rabbit, Sigrid, out to play. He is larger than a pug and definitely has far more personality than a cat. And finally, there is Hermann, our family’s 20-pound African Leopard Tortoise. Although she is a bit of a hermit and would prefer that we leave her alone, she tolerates our presence because we bring her food and fill her kiddie pool so she can soak on hot days.

TRAVEL. Thank you planes, trains, and automobiles, for making our world easier to see. Thanks, COVID and high gas prices and Southwest Airlines technology issues, for trying to ruin it all. If you are a home body, this might not be your thing…but so many of us yearn to move beyond the walls of our home and experience other places. Travel brings us a little novelty, lifelong learning, culture, beauty, excitement, and unpredictability into our hum drum lives. I go places both near and far from my house on a regular basis. I just visited Yosemite National Park – again. That place is drop dead gorgeous, but even more spectacular this year because they had something like 300+ percent of their annual projected snowfall/precipitation this year. The waterfalls and river and simply bursting! But travel doesn’t have to be extravagant or expensive. It’s possible to take a free hike in your area to see new points of interest or how the terrain has changed over the years, which I also frequently do.

ART. This isn’t just snooty ponderings about the internal broodings of a poor, starving artist who slathered a broken swath of blue paint onto a blank canvas and titled it, “The Sky is Falling”. This is about self expression through various mediums including, but not limited to: music, dance, theater, painting, pottery, architecture, basket weaving, quilting, sculpting, interior decorating, and movie making. I love to color (yes, like in coloring books), fold origami, decorate my house, sew, play flute, and build miniature settings (like dollhouses). Art is the use of our creative and imaginative energies to communicate and enhance our human experience…or, if we are less artistically inclined, it is still nice to observe something with artistic beauty and simply enjoy it for what it means to us. I personally love to combine travel and art by watching tour videos of museums, but I turn off the sound and incorporate another one of my favorite things into the experience as well…

BOOKS. More specifically, for that last point, I listen to audiobooks while virtually wandering the halls of, say, the Hermitage. But I’m also an avid page-turner and I’m known to swipe left quite often in my Libby and Kindle apps. I do love the feeling of paper on my fingertips, the satisfaction of visible progress as I move through a book, and the individual learning I get out of a good informative book or the imaginary relationships I form as a result of reading an engrossing work of fiction…so the public library is a common part of my routine. I also like to write books and blogs. I am a verbal processor, so words are enlightening to me.

I keep these things, and many more, listed out in the notes section of my phone on a list titled “A Few of My Favorite Things.” I add to it and take from it as my life shifts and changes, as lives do. On particularly grey days, when I’m depressed or stuck in a rut, I refer to it and I am reminded of all the things that make me unique, all the things I take the most joy in, and all the ways I could pull myself back into the light. I pick one and do it. When I lack the energy, I obviously gravitate toward less energetic activities on the list. But as life is breathed back into me and energy begins to return, I am able to experience more of my favorite things, which deposits into my bank of positive memories that I can later draw upon when I once again hit hard times.

Perhaps you think me ridiculous for assigning myself extra work. Maybe you loathe the idea of writing or you see writing it all down as unnecessary because you can remember everything required of you as well as every detail about yourself, others, and the world without written reminders. More power to you! The purpose of this blog is not to transform every reader into a Mini Me. The purpose of this blog is to share what works for me as I battle through daily life with PTSD, depression, and anxiety. If what works for me doesn’t help you, best to move along and find what does but attempting to blow holes in what isn’t a right fit for you is unkind. If what works for me helps you, I’m grateful I could be a part of your journey. If what works for me gets the wheels spinning in your own head and you think of something different that will uniquely work for you, that’s fantastic! I hope you harness that creative energy and use it to usher in better and brighter days. Regardless of your situation, I’m glad you’re here and I wish you moments filled with your favorite things as you navigate this life.